Motivation, Goals, Motherhood & All That Jazz....

        My husband/trainer asked me this morning, pre-coffee, what exactly my goals were. Considering we have been together for almost 18 years, I wanted to hit him in the head with my coffee mug...Well, before I filled it with the elixir of the Gods, of course. He meant my fitness goals. See, I've worked out with him for almost 2 years now, helped him follow his dreams & start his own business, but somehow, with the addition of new clients, he forgot what I was really "working" for. Most people this time of year have a reason to head to the gym: The New Year's Resolution drive, the great deals on gym memberships, the idea of going on vacation in the warmer months and not wanting to wear a Walmart house coat, I could go on. Well, I don't have a goal like that. I think goals for me are a set up for epic fail and a disgraceful fall into a box of lemon twist oreos. I don't know exactly what I weigh. My trainer/husband weighs me but makes me look up. I know what my weight range is, thanks to the lovely nurse who not only weighed me with clothes on during my GYN check up, but felt the need to say, "I need to move this notch up a bit". I'm not looking to lose a miracle weight Biggest Loser style. My goals are long but simplistic...

        I want to be naked and have my husband not catch his hand in one of the rolls on my back when I'm channeling my inner Beyonce sex goddess. I want to dance wildly and not look like I need a defibrillator so that I can embarrass my teenagers. I want to take my daughter to the mall and not wish for poison when I see that she wants to keep shopping, but my body feels like it traveled the Underground Railroad just walking from our parking spot. I do not want to hear, "You look great for 5 kids!" I want to look great. I want to put on the most hottest MILF outfit know to man when my birthday comes in April and say, "And this is what 35 looks like" and make much of facebook envy in my awesomeness and throw up on themselves. I want my back not to feel like 5 epidurals of hell, more like 2-ish. I'm sick of knowing when rain is approaching in Seattle and I'm in New Jersey. I want to be able to wrestle all 4 of my boys if they come home with bad report cards. I don't want to look like the big one of the couple...Since my husband sheds weight faster than drawers on a spring breaker, I want to look like his female equal. I want to prevent what I'm watching my Nana fight, dementia, hypertension & diabetes.

          See? Not the typical I want to lose 20 lbs for the summer than eat cheesecake all winter response. For me, fitness is the rest of my life. Yes, 2 years has changed me physically in major ways but there's still soooooo much more to go. I'm a true believer in life that your goals should always be to strive for more. You should be happy, you shouldn't strive for perfection, BUT you should always want to learn, grow, change into a bigger, smarter prettier butterfly.... I want to always look for improvement in myself. I am proud of my journey, especially the motherhood part, but I want to always be my own motivation. I say to my kids all of the time what my dad has pushed with me- You should always lay your head on your pillow at night feeling you have done something good for yourself, your family and your world. My kids are my biggest motivation to want more, be more, live more. My husband is my support & travel guide to my goals, but the biggest person I want to be better for is finally ME. It's always a long road when traveling to your goals, but looking back at me 2 years ago & now, I'm liking this journey more daily!